Dedicated to Dustin and Jenny

For those unaware, I have an older brother named Dustin, who has a wife named Jenny, who wears adorable green rainboots.

Dustin and Jenny live in SoCal in a little apartment by the sea. There are palm trees and flowers, and gulls wheeling overhead. They have 500,000 close neighbors who also live in little apartments by the sea. They have an awesome sushi restaurant nearby, organic grocery stores, and are a stones throw from Santa Barbara. But the coolest part of Dustin and Jenny's SoCal lives are their friends Doug and Myra

Actually, from this point on they will be known as Myra and Doug, because I think it's Myra's turn to be listed first. I haven't met them yet but Dustin has talked about them so much that I feel like they are my friends now too. Well, my imaginary friends because I think Dustin made them up one day while he was sitting in his apartment by the sea.

Dustin has a lot of time to think about guns and new ways to make money and to invent imaginary friends because he only works one day a month. He spends the rest of his time driving to the Valley to install one door knob or paint a heater vent plate but inevitabley when he gets there he either forgot a tool or his customer decided to leave without telling him. He then drives home and sits in his apartment talking to Myra and Doug.

From what we can understand, they are pretty much a super hero couple living incognito like the Incredibles, and they drive off to random locations at the spur of the moment. This is where it gets weird for me, because I find it hard to believe that Dustin's imaginary friends like to drive because as we all know, Dustin hates road trips. I can tell you why too....it stems from the time that the cat decided to have diarrhea on him while he was sleeping in the van on our trip across the AZ desert. This is also why he hates cats.

Anyway, maybe the road trip part is Jenny's imaginary contribution. I think it must be, because Jenny drinks coffee and all coffee drinkers are sane, balanced, highway loving people. We like to be on the road watching the sunrise while we sip our lattes/mochas/cuppajoe. Dustin could not have invented the road trip part of Myra and Doug. This is not just me talking...this is science. I conducted a scientific study (meaning I thought it over while writing the above sentence and decided to report my thoughts as hard facts) that proved my point.

I personally know 4 pilots/student pilots. None of them drink coffee (now we know why planes crash), they are all serious by nature, and they don't like to drive long distances (well the other three might...I'm not really sure. I'm adapting their lives to fit my purpose and since no one else knows who they are I have full creative license to do so). Add into that mix the fact that my brother is one of the four and we have scientifically and logically established that it is impossible for Myra and Doug to take road trips in his imagination.

I don't understand why it takes researchers sssoooo many years in their laboratories to prove whatever their point is...I can do it in five minutes.